This man has completely revolutionized my life. I went from a fact-believing science enthusiastic atheist to a God fearing America-loving republican conservative.
Stephen Colbert has made me see that if i don’t change my wicked ways of relying on fact and questioning the American government i will certainly burn in hell for all eternity.
I see now that the only way i can save my life is by repenting and living my Stephen Colberts rule of alienating homosexuals and mexicans.
Thanks to Stephens 2 page summation of The Holy Bible i can now say that i know what the Bible is. I could even say that i have actually read the whole Bible because i have a gut feeling that i have. And no fact or question you could throw at me could persuade my gut to say differently.
Now I know that I am publishing this on the internet, which of course is completely wrong because the internet has a clear liberal bias, one which i would not like to be part of. But until Fox News answers my phone calls, the internet and my sandwich board are all the ways I have to spread the word.
This book is great!
You should immediately purchase a copy for yourself and at least 5 copies to give to friends and loved ones – or, if you have no friends and loved ones, purchase a bunch of copies to give to your enemies, they might thank you and become your friends!
This book will not only teach you the most important lessons in life, like ignoring old people is perfectly OK, or that all religions are OK, so long as you worship the Lord Jesus Christ in it.
You will also learn things to make your life more valuable, like ruling over an animal and not having pre-marital sex. You will see that higher education and science are clearly among the greatest threats to American society and only opens the door for terrorists to come in and rape your mother.
After i read this book, I repented my sinful ways of living and now preach the word of – I hope I am not too presumptuous here, but i don’t think Stephen would mind – the new prophet of God — Stephen Colbert!
